Davina Quits Big Bro'!

"Screw you guys, I'm....oh, you get the gist!"


Big Brother stalwart, Davina McCall is set to quit her long running stint as Big Brother host after the current series 8 ends.


A source close to Davina says, "Davina loves doing Big Brother but she knows when enough is enough. She enjoys the show and is very fond of everyone she works with but wants to spread her wings and go on to something different. She is worried about getting pigeonholed so has made the hard decision to walk out."


Judging by Davina's past attempts at diversifying, this could be a catastrophic decision on her part. Aside from the hugely successful, but now defunct dating show, Streetmate, Davina has had minimal success with other projects.


Only last year, her BBC 1 chat show, Davina was slated by critics and audiences alike. She was the highest paid TV star that year, with her Big Brother deal and her one off fee of £500, 000 from the BBC for just 8 episodes of the flop-talk show. It caused a scandal amongst license fee payers who felt their taxes were not being put to good use.


Despite her resignation from Big Brother, Channel 4 executives have vowed the show will go on. The channel has a 3 year deal with production company Endemol to ensure the reality series continues on their network. The deal is reputed to be worth £180 million.

Davina has hosted Big Brother in the UK since its first series back in 1999. She has become the synonymous face of the programme. We at The Trash Heap... seriously doubt the programme will be as good without her.

Good luck Davina, but I suspect you'll go crawling back to Ch4 if you past ventures are anything to go by.



My, my, 1st of June seems to be shaping up as the day everyone quits something!

Winehouse Quits Music?!?

"Screw you guys, I'm goin' home too!"


Mega talented soul singer, Amy Winehouse today revealed she has plans to quit the music biz.....for motherhood!!!

The alcohol and drug loving singer said, "I don't want to be ungrateful. I know I'm talented, but I wasn't put here to sing. I was put here to be a wife and a mom and look after my family."

Was she fucked off her face at the time? Amy, love you were put here to sing the blues! You are the blues! How can you even consider quitting? Can't you do both music and motherhood!?
"I wanna have your babies."

Amy continues, "I'm a caretaker and I want to enjoy myself and spend time with my husband... Blake and I didn't get to spend any time together for a long time."

We fear the influence of luuuurve is smiting her blues mentality and maybe clogging her creative juices. Amy wed long term partner, Blake Fielder-Civil in a Miami ceremony earlier this month.

If this news wasn't bad enough, Amy goes on to undersell her talent even further by saying, "I've done a couple of albums I'm really proud of and that's about it".

*Gasp!*

Well, we at The Trash Heap... are flabbergasted. It seems everyone's quitting something this week. If it ain't LA, it's music and if it ain't music it's drugs and alcohol. If things carry on like this there will be nothing to write about! *sniff!*

Young Girl Divorces Father Figure

"Keep your money, you Ginger Whinger!"

Fave couple Chris Evans and Billie Piper have finally been granted a divorce, 3 years after having separated.

Popular actress, Piper (25) was 17 years Evans' junior when they first wed.

Media mogul, Evans famously seduced Piper by buying her a Ferrari filled with red rose petals, despite the fact that she could not drive at the time.

The couple met on Evans' now defunct show, TFI Friday in 2001 and married only 5 months later in Vegas at a whopping cost of just £250.

Many sceptics believed their marriage would fail (and they were right!!!), but it has been clear to see these two had a very good relationship up until their separation in 2004. Even now, Chris and Billie are seen to be very close friends.

Billie feels so much affection for her estranged hubby that she's even declare she won't pursue a claim for any money or possessions during their marriage.

Evans is thought to be worth almost £100 million, but Billie was never in it for the money. We suspect she needed a father figure at the time, but hey, who knows!?

Piper is a two times BAFTA award winning actress, and is most famous for her role as Rose Tyler in Doctor Who alongside Christopher Eccleston and now David Tennant. Piper left the series last year in an emotional storyline. She has since gone on to star in acclaimed dramas, "Jane Austin's 'Mansfield Park'" and the Phillip Pullman adaptation, "The Ruby In The Smoke".

Evans is currently riding high with his popular BBC Radio 2 show for which he has won 2 Sony Awards, but hey, let's face it - he hardly needs the work with the dosh he's got in the bank.

We at The Trash Heap... wish Billie and Chris all the best for their future and hope they have a speedy divorce.

Ozzy's Gender Confusion

"Where the fuck am I, maaaan?"

Bless Ozzy Osbourne. We always knew he was two sheets to the wind and then some..., but he's excelled himself recently.

Upon hearing of wife, Sharon's new co-host, Dannii Minogue on this years up and coming X-factor, Ozzy proclaimed, "Danny? I've never heard of him. Is he Kylie's Dad?"

Aaaaw, well no Ozzy he's not Kylie's Dad. He is in fact a she and is Kylie's lil' sis, spelt D-a-n-n-i-i!

We miss Ozzy and his fly on the wall family documentary series. I say bring it back!

(lft)"Dannii Minogue: She-male?"

Mika Stalked By Hilton!

#"Everybody's gonna love this gay!"#

We at The Trash Heap... have been following what can only be described as obsessive behaviour in the form of renowned 'sleb blogger, Perez Hilton.

Hilton, famously known for lampooning celebratards on his daily blog (he's our hero and inspiration!) has been plugging popster, Mika on his blog for some months now. However, it appears Hilton is trying to plug Mika in more ways than one!

Hilton's readership seem to not care for Mika the way Perez does. In fact, they are down right vile about him. Comments such as, "He looks really retarded, and extremely unattractive", along with "Skinny nerd...singing bad falsetto" is just a snippet of the regular tirade aimed at Mika by Hilton fans.

All this venom from his readers, yet Perez continues to plug and plug and plug Mika. We have to ask, what's the deal?

Rumours are rife surrounding Mika's sexuality. Many believe the UK singer to be gay. Hilton has never hidden his own sexuality. A self professed out and proud latino, we suspect Perez has the hots for Mika.

We know the two have definitely met. One can only wonder how hot things got when they got down and dirrtty in the mosh pit of luuuurve!

You go for it Perez. We just wanna see you happy. Like Britney. *cough*

Beth Ditto's Unlikely Pair(ing)

"I fucking love apples, I do."

Beth Ditto, lead singer of punk band Gossip has not only revealed her birthday suit to this week's NME, but also her love of model (and full time skank-bag) Kate Moss.

Ditto, who poses fully nude on the cover of the latest NME edition professes that Moss is, "amazing".

Beth said, "Kate is amazing. I spent one night talking to her and she just said the most amazing things about bodies. At first I didn't think I was going to like her, but she just turned up to one of our shows and said, 'Do you know what I hate, Beth? I hate it when people tell my big girlfriends, 'You have a beautiful face...' ....That's a really radical concept," concludes Ditto.

We at The Trash Heap.... *heart* Beth Ditto, but we can't help but feel she's selling herself a little short, and over egging the pudding as far as Moss is concerned. To me, Kate Moss making the kind of statement she did just smacks of a ploy to get the Gossip singer on side. After all, Kate is a veteran of the most shallow, fickle industry in the world; fashion. Surely she knows how to talk the talk when she wants someone on side?

After all, you'd never want to make an enemy of Beth Ditto.

Surviving Cancer: So Boring!

"Will I ever have fun again?"

Who'd have thought that after her two year cancer battle, Kylie would celebrate her 39th Birthday on Monday by doing piss-flaps all!?

The Trash Heap... confident, Perez Hilton revealed that ar' Kylie chose to spend this milestone day at her home in rainy London, locked away from the outside world.

We at The Trash Heap... had notions that the perpetual Princess of Pop and part time spinster would have at least called up lesser fabulous, lesser rich and lesser internationally successful younger sis, Dannii for a girly botox par-tay. Alas, we were wrong!

Kylie, live a little luv. It may have been a grey day in Londinium, but with your wads of cash we thought you'd have at least been creative and jetted off to sunnier climbs.

After surviving breast cancer, we rather hoped Kylie would be showing a little more gusto for life.

Cheer up, luv.





"I'm alive. I'm bored."

Evening Worship At The Temple Of Tori

"I'm Not Crazy....I'm Fucking Bonkers!"



Everyone's favorite piano playing nerd kicked off her world tour this Monday. Tori Amos takes in 30 date tour with new material from her latest album, "American Doll Posse".



Once she completes the tour towards the end of July, she then embarks on a
"Nicola from Girls Aloud was keen for credibility"

series of Festivals. As of yet, there are no UK Festivals announced for which she is due to appear.



"American Doll Posse" is Amos' 9th studio album, and certainly her most commercially accessible since the 1998 release, "From The Choirgirl Hotel". The concept for the album sees Tori take on five distinctly individual personalities, each with her own name, beliefs and characteristics. As a unit they make up the whole person Amos is. They can also stand alone, apart from her.



She explains, "What I'm trying to tell other women is they have their own version of the compartmentalised feminine which may have been repressed in each one of them. For many years I have been an image; that isn’t necessarily who I am completely. I have made certain choices and that doesn’t mean that those choices are the whole story. I think these women are showing me that I have not explored honest extensions of the self who are now as real as the redhead."



"Now I live in Cornwall, I gorge on clotted cream!"

Tori's been known as a kooky kinda gal since she hit our consciousness back in 1992 with her second, and multi platinum selling album, "Little Earthquakes". Since then she's gone on to sell nearly 17 million albums worldwide and has an army of loyal, adoring fans, me being one of them.



Folk often write Tori off as a feminist loon, but all I can say to that is your Mother's must suck cocks in Hell and you have absolutely no fucking idea what you're talking about.



For more info on Tori and her tour, click here























"I'm mad, I am. It's true. I'm simply craaa-zeee!"

Lauren Hill Releases New Song (and it's brilliant!!!)

"I Lost Myself, Don't 'Cha Know!"



Ex-Fugees front woman and internationally successful solo artist, Lauren Hill has finally returned with a new song.


"Loose Myself" features on the soundtrack to new Columbia Pictures animation, "Surf's Up". The film is scheduled for release on the 8th June in the US.



Loza has shunned the lime light since her 18 million selling album, "The Miseducation of Lauren Hill". She became exceptionally introspective, choosing to no longer do interviews, watch TV and even abandoned listening to music. Instead, Hill began exploring other avenues of creativity, including writing poetry.


She recently announced a world tour for 2007, whereby she will visit 8 countries including the UK and, obviously the US.


Loza has a new album slated for release in early 2008. As of yet it is untitled, but rumours speculate it has the working title of "Call Me Ms. Hill". Further rumours suggest the album was pushed back by Columbia Records because they felt it wasn't commercial sounding.


Fans petitioned Columbia Records in 2006, demanding the new album be released. As a response to that, speculation suggests Hill has parted ways with Columbia Records and is looking to release the album via a new record label.


You go, Lauren! I've missed you so much these (almost) 10 years!


Check out the new single here, or click on the post title.

Rufus Wainwright Loves...er, Rufus Wainwright

"I Touch Myself, I Want You To Love Me"

Singer/songwriter and piano maestro extraordinaire, Rufus Wainwright ain't the bashful type. Oh no sirree. In an interview published in today's Independent, the prolific performer expressed an ego big enough to put the likes of Madge, JLo and any other A-League Diva to shame.

"The thing is...is that I like to tell the truth - in ev-er-y-thing", drawls the New York based songster. "And the truth of the matter is, I really am extremely good at what I do."

Wow! If he's referring to not yet having broken the mainstream and garnered a hit, he's spot on. "What? Should I be falsely modest and pretend that, actually, I'm not that great? No, no. For me that would never work. I am great and that's all there is to it."

Nice.

Having seen Mr. Wainwright in concert a couple of times I can confirm that he really is an exceptional musician. That said, note to Rufus: no one likes a big head my friend. Drop the 'tude. You may endear yourself more to potential record buyers, and lord knows you need the sales!

Happy Birthday Kylie! The Future Holds....

Happy 39th Birthday, 'ar Kylie!

Bless. We at The Trash Heap... love La Kylie, and it is our great pleasure to wish the eternal Princess of Pop a very happy and healthy 39th Birthday today!

After a 2 year breast cancer battle, today is a day I bet Kylie wondered if she would ever see. Needless to say, she's a picture of health and well on the road to full recovery.

So, what does the future hold for Ms. Minogue (will she ever become a "Mrs", or is she destined to be a Spinster Of This Parish forever!?!)

Recent spies have revealed Kylie's future plans in what can only be described as either a big gaffe, or a marvellous PR exercise on behalf of Kylie's best friend and creative director, Will Baker. Spotted leaving a Soho eattery, Mister Baker held an envelope with what looked like a "To Do" list scrawled on it. Was it his own? Was it 'eck! It was Kylie's of course. The highly acclaimed stylist only went and held the flippin' list in full view of the paps (check out the pic top right).

The Trash Heap casted its beady eyes over the document and we were rather chuffed and excited with what we read. Check it out....

• Mags (upcoming magazine articles/shoots & PR)


• Tour next year (rumours of a US tour - how exciting! Finally the Yanks get the full Kylie Experience!)


• Coty perfume (follow up fragrance to last year's # 1 selling and award winning 'Darling')


• Songs (from "W. D.") to Parkinson (performing a couple of tracks from the new album on an upcoming Parkinson appearance... album appears to be titled "White Diamond", or could just be a working title)


• White Diamond promo (This is the upcoming fly on the wall documentary of Kylie's cancer recovery leading up to the Showgirl: Homecoming Tour. Possibility of film festivals/releases/downloads?)


• Acting coach's number (Kylie swotting up for that film musical she's mentioned, or could it be her forthcoming role in the Christmas Day episode of Doctor Who?)


• When Dr Who script arriving? Russell's number (as mentioned earlier - the Xmas Day ep. Russell as in Russell T. Davis, the Head Writer for Dr. Who)

How exciting! Not only do we bring you all of this Kylie news, but also some goss about the forthcoming Kylie album due out later this year (God willing!).

We have it on good authority that the two Boy George tracks he penned for her, and which she has recorded will definitely not make the final album cut. *Gasp!* Is this her revenge for him designing her that Gaaaaaawd Awful encore outfit for the Homecoming Tour!? Hmmmm, maybe not. While Kylie and EMI feel the songs are "not quite right", she is definitely keen to have him involved in the project in some capacity. Rumour has it that she's interested in recording a Culture Club track as a tribute to George. I dunno about you, but that sounds like a shit idea to me!

We're beginning to wonder what the Hell this up and coming album is going to sound like. Well, apparently La Kylie is interested in "meaningful" and "interesting" lyrics placed with commercial sounds. A source says, "Musically, the brief has been described as Fever meets Impossible Princess meets the Scissor Sisters and Mika. She’s going for a mix of harder dance sounds; some lighter camp, glittery numbers like White Diamond; and several songs specifically designed to showcase her voice. It will be a diverse album, but all held together by Kylie’s great pop sensibility.”

Phew! Well, that's a relief. For a moment there I was worried, what with the Culture Club cover and all that. Mind you, I think Mika is utter shit but so long as she doesn't end up riding his arse for some album sales I'll be happy. We'll be very interested to know how she intends to merge the dark, underproduced and edgy sounds of her critically acclaimed (but commercially dead) 1997 album, Impossible Princess with the 8+ million selling Fever album. Impossible Princess is a hidden gem for many a Kylie fan, and moreso for you part-timer fans too. If you haven't got it, check it out.

Anyhow, we here at The Trash Heap hope that wherever you are and whatever you're doing right now, Kylie you are having fun! Go girl!