Courtney Cox Quits Surgery!

"Screw you guys, I'm not goin' home because I already am home. But, I am not chopping myself up!" (hmm, soundbitey!)

Former Friends star, Courtney Cox Arquette has been told by loser hubby, David to quit any thoughts of plastic surgery.

Cox, 42 spawned a daughter, Coco (what, the clown?) in 2004. Since then she feels she's never managed to regain her pre-preggers figure.

"I have a permanent baby belly", says Cox. "I have issues with getting older too. I obsess over the changes. David has a huge problem with surgery, but I don't."

David's "issues" with the plastic

"I hate my body! *Whinge* *Moan* *Whinge*"

fantastic mean that he's allegedly banned her from even having a consult on the matter. Sources close to the couple report that the two are in total lock down over the issue. Courtney really wants a tummy tuck, but David has threatened it will have dyer consequences for their relationship if she does.

Ooooo! Get him.

Courtney is currently riding high in the US with her executive produced drama, Dirt in which she plays an editor of a gossip magazine. The show has just been recommissioned for a 2nd series after having been a ratings hit with American viewers. We sure hope Ch4 picks it up over here in the UK.

Kelly To Torture Music Lovers (again!)

"Shut up, you douche bags!"

Oh shit! We're trembling in our boots. Crack open the ear plugs people, Kelly Osbourne is making yet another, er, ... "musical" comeback!

"I have more song ideas, and it won't be long", threatens 'ar Kel.

Frankly honey, you barely make the grade presenting Project Catwalk (UK). Don't believe me? Check out the website link here. The show producers haven't even replaced Liz Hurley's image with your own. That's how "good" you are , luv.

Give it up, Kel. Retire. You have the money. Just go quietly. Pleeeeeeaaaase!

Mika Stalked By Hilton!

#"Everybody's gonna love this gay!"#

We at The Trash Heap... have been following what can only be described as obsessive behaviour in the form of renowned 'sleb blogger, Perez Hilton.

Hilton, famously known for lampooning celebratards on his daily blog (he's our hero and inspiration!) has been plugging popster, Mika on his blog for some months now. However, it appears Hilton is trying to plug Mika in more ways than one!

Hilton's readership seem to not care for Mika the way Perez does. In fact, they are down right vile about him. Comments such as, "He looks really retarded, and extremely unattractive", along with "Skinny nerd...singing bad falsetto" is just a snippet of the regular tirade aimed at Mika by Hilton fans.

All this venom from his readers, yet Perez continues to plug and plug and plug Mika. We have to ask, what's the deal?

Rumours are rife surrounding Mika's sexuality. Many believe the UK singer to be gay. Hilton has never hidden his own sexuality. A self professed out and proud latino, we suspect Perez has the hots for Mika.

We know the two have definitely met. One can only wonder how hot things got when they got down and dirrtty in the mosh pit of luuuurve!

You go for it Perez. We just wanna see you happy. Like Britney. *cough*

Watch Lilly Murder Blondie!

Lilly Allen Kills Blondie (and not in a good way)!

Oh dear, oh dear! Love her or loathe her, this chick just murdered perhaps the most famous Blondie song ever. If that's not bad enough, Lil' only went and did it with Blondie as her backing band and the fabulous Debbie Harry by her side to boot!

Click on the post Title or the link below to watch this travesty of travesties.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F3U_sVIIJqs